My Top 3 Emotions for Weight Loss [Ep. 98]

Transcript

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This is the.

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Well live well podcast.

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I'm Lisa Salsbury, and this is episode 98, my top three emotions for weight loss.

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Welcome to Eat Well, Think Well, Live Well; the podcast for women who want to lose weight, but are tired of counting and calculating all the food.

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I'm your host, Lisa Salsbury.

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I'm a certified health and weight loss coach and life coach, and most importantly a recovered chronic dieter.

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I'll teach you to figure out why you are eating when you aren't hungry, instead of worrying so much about what you are eating.

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Welcome to summertime.

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I don't know about you, but my daughter finished school this past week.

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So first week of June or officially in summertime and wow.

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Some of our brain really just started off strong because I recorded half this podcast with my microphone on mute.

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Which means I recorded nothing.

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So here we go again, take two.

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Um, the weather here in California is really cooperating on the summer thing.

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It's going to be over a hundred degrees for a few days.

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So just coming in hot, the summer weather.

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I've already heard of us, did a couple of zucchini and I ate one singular cherry tomato this morning when I was out doing some fertilizing and tending my garden boxes.

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So that was exciting.

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Summertime often elicits a desire to drop some weight.

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Since we uncover our bodies from the layers of winter clothing.

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Maybe you're transitioning your wardrobe and noticing things are not fitting the way they may be used to.

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So for whatever reason, you might be looking to drop some weight.

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As you know, I don't provide meal plans because I help you create a meal plan that works best for you.

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And your lifestyle.

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And family by tweaking your own food journal.

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But what I do provide is emotional plans.

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I always want to help you pick from the very best emotions that can fuel weight loss.

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So today I want to talk to you about my three favorite emotions for weight loss.

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If I was creating an emotion plan for you.

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These are the ones I would want you to pick from the most often.

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And they are curiosity, confidence, and commitment.

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I call them the big three CS.

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I know that's super creative, right?

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Like what a name, but you know how handy that they all start with C let's go through each one and talk about how to cultivate it, how to create more of it in your life and see why it helps you lose weight.

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So, number one is curiosity.

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Curiosity is really just so useful in widening our understanding, not only of ourselves, but of others.

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I think curiosity is the best way to stay out of judgment.

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Once we start judging others for their choices, we naturally allow ourselves to judge our own choices.

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It's rare that judgment in the thought and feeling line when we're thinking judgmental thoughts about others.

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Doesn't end with judging ourselves in the result line.

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Uh, curiosity can be the antidote to this.

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We create curiosity by using phrases.

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Like I wonder,.

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And rhetorical questions.

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Like what if.

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Wonder about anything and everything.

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Not to get an answer, but just to get curious.

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I wonder why she chose to dye her hair blue instead of, oh my goodness.

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Look at her hair, like genuinely wonder and stay out of judgment.

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I wonder when my cucumbers will be ready to pick.

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I wonder what that plant is called.

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I wonder when my next client will find me, I wonder what will resonate with my listeners.

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I wonder what will happen if I didn't eat that cookie?

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I wonder what I would feel like if I left three bites behind it dinner.

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What if I took a walk after dinner, how would that feel?

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I wonder how my body would feel if I ate just to enough instead of to full.

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Getting good at wondering about mundane things like blue hair and plants, and then translate it into wondering about work or other things you do.

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And then start wondering.

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About your habits and the activities, the promote weight loss.

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I wonder how I would feel if I went for a walk instead of stayed here and scrolled social media.

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These are the kinds of things we want to start asking yourself, truly get curious, and then do the experiment to see, take that walk.

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Try leaving the three bites behind check in with your body and see how it feels when you ate just two enough.

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What is going on for you?

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Be genuinely curious.

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In that state of wonder that has no judgment.

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This can be beneficial for weight loss, because it can lead you to trying new things.

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If you've always had a habit of eating snacks with your kids after school, you can wonder what it would be like to skip that snack.

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Or what it would be like to have a different snack than they are having.

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If you always eat popcorn at the movie, wonder what it would be like just to be entertained by the movie.

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Rather than needing something to do with your mouth to what would it be like to just watch a movie?

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How would that even go?

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The more you can get curious about what you are doing and how it's affecting your body and your results, the less judgmental you will become.

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And if we are less judgmental, we are less likely to shame and criticize ourselves.

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Because this curiosity also works great for after the fact.

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After we overeat get curious about why that happened.

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Instead of jumping to blame and shame, just ask yourself, what were you really needing?

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Right then?

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I wonder what else could have felt good to sooth that emotion?

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What else could work?

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That is a great curiosity question.

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Get curious instead of judgy.

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Okay.

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Number two is confidence.

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Confidence.

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Is the, I can do this stick to it-ness of weight loss.

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It's more than willpower.

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Confidence says I can do this no matter how many times I fail.

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It says failure only teaches me what doesn't work.

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It doesn't tell me anything about my worthiness.

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Confidence is about trusting yourself.

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This is where you gain the ability to have foods in the house that used to make you want to eat your face off.

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When you are confident that you can trust yourself, you can be in a house where treats exist without having to eat them all.

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Confidence has also the ability to feel any emotion.

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When, you know, you can feel negative emotions and not go directly to food that is confidence feeling bad and not overeating over.

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It will actually increase your confidence in your ability to feel negative emotions.

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Confidence is very far from arrogance.

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Arrogant says I'm better than you.

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And here's why.

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Arrogance puts people on a hierarchy.

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She's better than me, but I'm better than her, et cetera.

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Arrogance actually comes from a place of creating false confidence.

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By trying to put others down.

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It works by trying to raise your opinion of yourself by comparing yourself to others.

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Which ironically often does the exact opposite.

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True confidence helps you understand all humans are capable and worthy and you don't need to do any comparison to feel confident about yourself.

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You can cultivate more confidence by rejecting thoughts.

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Like, I don't know how or confident people don't feel fear like me.

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Or I'm different than super successful people.

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Those thoughts do not lead to confidence.

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You can create more confidence by considering the possibility of what you can create in the future.

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Interestingly, if you are also working on your curiosity.

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This can help you imagine futures that are full of possibilities.

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Thoughts that you can switch to include things like I am capable.

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The worst that can happen is a feeling.

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And I have my own back.

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Each time you remind yourself that fear is no big deal.

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And that you actually can totally feel a negative emotion, even an emotion like urge or craving without reacting to it or obeying it.

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That will increase your confidence.

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The interesting thing about confidence is that often.

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Ends up in the result line as much as I want it to be in the feeling line.

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And we can put it there, especially when we're thinking things like I'm capable.

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It goes in the feeling line, but often some of our actions lead to confidence and it becomes this great repeating circle.

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The last C is commitment.

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You have to know why you are doing this.

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Why do you want to lose weight?

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Maybe your health goals involve something other than scale weight, which I hope you have other things on your health list than just your scale weight.

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So that's great.

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Sometimes we want something.

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But we aren't really committed to it.

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There's a difference between wanting and committed.

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Think of things you're truly committed to.

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You're probably committed to being faithful to your spouse.

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You might be committed to showing up at your job.

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You have commitments to your children or maybe to your friends to show up at a certain time.

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A lot of times it's easier to be committed to other people.

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And not ourselves.

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Imagine, if you were as committed to the things you promised yourself, as you were to the things you promised to your loved ones.

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You are always the first person you're willing to cancel on and that's what needs to change to develop stronger commitment.

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When you're thinking you want to lose weight.

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I want you to ask yourself why.

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Why do I want this?

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And if you say so I can be healthy.

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That's not enough.

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You got to continue asking yourself why.

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Because no one puts their fork down when they're eating a delicious spaghetti dinner, because they just want to be healthy.

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That's the dinner.

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I tend to overeat if I'm not paying attention.

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And I don't just put my fork down because I'm like, well, I want to be healthy.

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Like, no, it's not enough.

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It's not enough of a commitment.

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We need more and better reasons we function better and can be more committed.

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If we have a very good reason for wanting to achieve our goals.

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So you see how commitment is much more than wanting.

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so I want you to continue asking why.

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Why do I want to lose weight?

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Why do I want to be healthy?

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And here's the thing.

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It doesn't have to be noble or special.

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You may get down to something physical or the way something looks in the mirror and maybe a certain item of clothing that you want to wear.

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That's fine.

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It may also be a functional reason.

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You have a vacation, you want to be able to walk, to see all the sites and it's 10 miles a day, and you want to be able to do that without pain.

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Maybe there's a hike you want to do this summer that you couldn't last summer.

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Maybe you want to go up the stairs in your home without trouble, or you just want to get your first pull-up.

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Continue asking yourself why and get as many reasons why you want this goal.

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As possible.

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These are the things that will help you develop your commitment.

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One thing to note, these reasons should be true.

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Regardless of what time it is or what day of the week.

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If they don't matter to you at 9:00 PM, when your spouse gets out the ice cream or your daughter starts popping popcorn.

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Then they don't actually matter.

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So many times late nights or weekends, we get into"so what?" Eating.

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So what it's just one, or I'll start again tomorrow, or it doesn't matter.

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If that isn't true in the morning.

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Or on Monday.

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Then it isn't actually true at 9:00 PM either.

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If you care a lot in the morning, or if it matters a lot.

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On Monday.

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Then it's a lie on Saturday night that it doesn't matter.

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Or man, I just don't care.

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You do care.

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Stop lying to yourself.

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When we develop our commitment, then our reasons for wanting to achieve our health and weight loss goals become easier to remember.

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24 hours a day.

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One way to start working on your commitment is to create a 24 hour practical plan.

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You know, I've talked about this a hundred times on the podcast, but decide in the morning what you will eat for the day.

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And then eat exactly that.

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When you first start just plan things.

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You're already going to eat.

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Because I guarantee if you plan a sandwich for lunch, your brain will be like, oh, well let's just have leftovers instead.

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It's not that the leftovers would be bad in some way.

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It's just that you want to practice eating exactly what you planned.

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This helps develop your commitment and believing yourself, you plan something and then you eat that thing.

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And then your brain goes, huh?

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I guess we can be trusted.

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Because remember if we're constantly canceling on ourselves, it's hard to believe we will ever be committed enough to actually lose our weight.

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Even with commitment.

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The two other emotions still play a part.

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Because you're human.

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You're not a robot and you will overeat.

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You will eat when you didn't plan to.

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And that's where you fall back on your confidence to handle the emotion of disappointment without going to more food.

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And you'll get curious about why that happened instead of judgmental.

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See how these three emotions are totally intertwined and yet essential for weight loss.

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They're my favorites.

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When you are thinking about how to create these emotions more often in your life.

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Start with thoughts that are outside the realm of weight loss, like how I said to get curious about plants.

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And other people and your job, et cetera.

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Think about ways you felt these emotions in the past or other things in your life you are confident about or committed to.

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And notice what thought led to that feeling?

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Then see how you can adopt that thought to your health and weight loss goals.

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If you need help, figuring out what thoughts help you to cultivate these emotions.

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Bring that to me in your free coaching call with me.

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You can get that schedule today and let me know, Hey, I want to work on some thoughts with you and ways to get started with my goals, and I will help you out link to get that scheduled is in the show notes as always.

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Thanks for listening and sharing the eat well think.

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Well live well podcast.

My Top 3 Emotions for Weight Loss [Ep. 98]

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